Hannah and Isis both Eliminated: Episode 4 Recap

Two eliminations this week... so harsh. The first half of the episode was all about runway. Miss J met the girls at a bowling alley and handed them high heels that were inspired by bowling shoes. Hannah cracked me up when she saw the shoes and said, "Wow, I didn't know they made stuff like that." It would be even funnier if we got to see her walk into a normal bowling alley with some friends and specifically request the high heeled bowling shoes. Haha! Then again, she probably never walks in heels unless she has to, judging by the way she walked in them this week. Miss J even said she walked like she had a bowling ball dropped on her head. It was pretty painful to watch.

Of course, that was not Hannah's best quote this week. I couldn't go on without mentioning that at the very beginning, Hannah was listening to some of the girls complaining and feeling upset about their performances and she said "I'm so over the pity parties. You've got to pick up your beans and keep on rolling." She puncuated this strange statement with a timely finger snap.

As for the other girls in the practice runb, Joslyn really turned it on and did a little extra, bringing her personality and strong energy to the makeshift bowling alley runway. Sam was told that she needed "rock her bow legs", which she seemed to take in stride, listening to Miss J's advice and doing her best to follow through. Elina got a little too "thinky" on the runway, controling every movement, but everyone else was fair. Oh, and WTH was up with McKey's crazy outfit in that scene? She looked like she just stepped off the set of Star Trek...

Later, back at the house, we got to see a tiny bit of house drama as Clark and Lauren Brie snuggled on the couch, dishing out their views of the other girls and how they look. The pair seemed to like Elina and McKey's "look" but dogged Isis hardcore in whispered voices. I must admit that I was disappointed to see Lauren Brie in cahoots with the likes of Clark. I was secretly hoping for Clark to fall on her face or take yet another bad pic this week and get voted out, but that is just not how the cards fell, my friends.

At the challenge this week, the models had to walk in a Jeremy Scott fashion show, Blindfolded. Yikes! Good thing so many of them practiced their walks at home the night before. Hannah, bless her heart, just wasn't getting any better, but she tried. Mr Jay and Miss J were both there to help judge the competition, as was Ann SHoket, editor in chief of Seventeen Magazine and frequent face on ANTM. Mr. Jay announced two very important things before the show began... #1 - The winner of the runway challenge would get to do a photo shoot of Kira Platinina's designs in a Seventeen Magazine shoot (Kira is a super famous 15 year old designer); and #2 - The girl at the bottom of the pack would be sent packing... no second chances and no photo shoot. I would have been completely shocked at this news if they hadn't already told us in the previews. Oh well.

So who nailed it and who screwed it up? Joslyn was the #1 girl on the runway, and she was hot. She really does look professional up there! I was really proud of Analeigh also. She seemed to finally find her confidence this week. Sheena looked great, and so did Isis and McKey. With all of those girls, it didn't seem as though the blindfolds really bothered them at all. They could see through them a tiny bit so they wouldn't fall off the runway, but I am sure it was still difficult. Overall, those were the best of the best. Clark and Marjorie wobbled through and Hannah looked every bit as horrible as she had at the bowling alley.

The designer also got really pissed off at Samantha because he had told her backstage that she absolutely should not lift her dress up. Then, when she got on stage, she did just that...I guess she was trying to be super confident and look sexy, but she put her hands on her hips and lifted her dress up so high that you could see her ass hanging out. He was PISSED. I am wondering if maybe she didn't understand that the black tights she was wearing were not supposed to be pants, but more like pantyhose. Either way, it is never a good idea to get out on the runway and do the one thing the designed told you NOT to do.

The only thing that saved Sam in this runway competition, I'm guessing, is that at least she seemed confident, and she has really shown a lot of promise in her photo shoots. Hannah, however, hasn't really done that well in any shoot or competition, and she was sent packing. Her response when her name was called? "Oh, Okay." and she walked off. I guess she decided to pick up her beans and keep rolling.

For the editorial shoot in Seventeen magazine, Joslyn got to take two friends, and she chose Sheena and Isis. They looked good together and I think that overall, the shoot went pretty well. Good job Joslyn! Hard to believe she tried out for ANTM so many times and didn't get in until now. She is really talented!


PHOTO SHOOT

Early in the morning, while all the girls were still sleeping, Mr. Jay came in and woke them up with a very loud whistle. What an awful way to wake up! I would have been so cranky, but the girls seemed to handle it well as soon as they realized they were about to do a photo shoot right there at their house.

When they got out to the pool, I thought it was about to be Tyra taking their pictures, but I was just a bit off. Nigel came up out of the water in a dramatic fashion and told the girls that their "Eyes are the windows to your soul." Their directions in the shoot were to have their heads underwater, just letting their nose and eyes peek up from the water, and then possibly to have their hands or anything in a great, unique pose. I thought this was a neat photo shoot and really tested their ability to think outside of the box. The only one who was truly scared of the water was Joslyn, who confessed that she cannot swim. Girl better learn, that's all I'm saying.

Even though I had been secretly hoping for Clark to underperform again this week, she cranked it up a notch and turned it on for Nigel. Mr. Jay thought the only reason she was doing a good job was because she was trying to turn Nigel on... I don't think she did the way she had hoped, but he did seem to like her performance. Overall, the shoot was a big success. Lauren Brie was great as usual, and even Analeigh brought her A-Game ("Yo, I'm like, a model") Sheena looked better than ever in her ethnic, tribal look and Samantha was doing some unique poses. Elina, the winner from last week, pretty much tanked, though. She basically just froze up in front of Nigel and said "I'm stuck". She never really got un-stuck, but her sheer beauty was enough to pull her through this kind of shoot I think.

I really felt for Isis in this shoot though. For the second week, they had her in a bathing suit, and this time it was even skimpier and more revealing than the week before... and she was in the water. Unfortunately, she was more worried about whether her tape would come off in the water and set her remaining male parts free, than she was about putting together a good photo. It's a tough situation. On one hand, I think it was mean to do something that they knew she would find uncomfortable two weeks in a row. On the other hand, if she wants to be a model, she has to find a way to at least appear focused and comfortable no matter what the situation. The truth is, they probably already had the photo shoots planned out and put in order before they even picked the girls in the first place.





PANEL


Tyra Mail! As the girls read that panel was coming up and someone was going to be eliminated, Clark waved to Elina's digital photo and said "Goodbye Elina." That was the first time I had heard any tiny bit of jealousy or drama about the digital photo, but I thought it was pretty catty considering that Elina had already told them she didn't do a good job in her shoot. Clark gets more and more evil as the weeks go on. Her dark hair was so appropriate.

At panel, Miss J's necklace was down to number 10 (complete with a paper 0 taped to his chest because someone stole his number!) In the critiques, the judges praised Sheena for her intensity and loved the "mystery" in Lauren Brie's eyes. They all agreed that Joslyn looked terrified, but that Marjorie had delivered a wicked kind of beauty in her photo. Isis' pic did not turn out well at all, bless her heart. Neither did Elina's, but her performance up to now has been so good that she's still safe for now.

McKey's picture was intense and beautiful, but Paulina hated her giant hand coming up from the water. I will say that her hand did look a bit awkward and manly, but her eyes are just amazing. Speaking of amazing eyes, Clark really put on her bedroom eyes and smiled the way that Tyra loves. I guess now we know that Nigel inspires her! Analeigh had a good picture also, looking so great with her legs up above the water. Paulina even said that if Analeigh had a bad picture, she would have been voting her off, but that her great performance this week has kept her going. Samantha had another great picture, and guest judge, designer Jeremy Scott said that although hers was the best picture, she was the absolute worst in his runway show. He really tore her up in panel, but she handled it very well, keeping her mouth shut and nodding in understanding.

After making the girls leave and going through the photos again (with Scott making another comment about how Sam walked like a mix between a truck driver and a stripper in his show), they called them back in to reveal the results. Clark and her squeeky clean, just washed red face was named photo of the week, which just tore me up. She has totally sucked every other week up to now, and she somehow moved from the bottom to the top overnight. Analeigh also moved up to number two, but I felt better about this rise because we have been watching Analeigh really work to get better. Lauren Brie and Sheena were the next called. At the bottom were Elina, Samantha, and Isis. I guess this week really turned the competition on its head considering that Elina was almost in the bottom 2 after a best photo last week.

Samantha and Isis were the two put on the chopping block and Samantha had tears running down her face as she took another flogging from Tyra about her runway faux pas. I am sure she will never make that same mistake again! Isis was the one sent home, however, because of two weak photos in a row. I was glad she at least got to do the Seventeen magazine shoot with Joslyn, but I had been hoping she would get farther in the competition. Tyra told her she had been a great role model to the "Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender" community (Did I get em all Miss J??) The problem with Isis was that even though she was different, she was scared to step up and stand out. The judges felt that she should have embraced her differences with more passion instead of trying to look and act like the other girls. I am sad to see Isis go, because she was one of my favorites. I love that she wore a tiara as she packed up and walked out of the house. I have a feeling that she will be very successful as long as she keeps believing in herself and giving it her all.

Nikeysha Sent Packing - Week 2 Recap

The drama has officially begun in casa de top model this week. After last week's previews, we knew it was going to start heating up, but there were more racially motivated arguments this week than there were gay men... and that's really saying something.

The two big questions asked this week were "Are you racist?" and "Can you pose?". I am not sure if either of those is quite as interesting as the "How do you hide your package?" question from last week, but it will just have to do. I was also a bit disappointed in the fact that no one had a jealous behind-her-back bitch fest about Marjorie's picture that was digitally displayed in the house all week with the words "Intelligent, Divine, Marvelous" written across the screen. Maybe we will get to hear some jealous comments later. We didn't really hear much out of Marjorie this week at all, come to think of it, but I'll get to her later.

House Drama: Are you racist?

For now, let's discuss the major issue at hand. Is there a racist lurking in the top model house this season? Perhaps. It all started when the girls were crammed into the hot tub (yes, all 13 of them in a big tub). Truth or dare already had Hannah out of her comfort zone. You could practically see her wanting to bolt when Clark was dared to kiss Elina, which actually was pretty hot. I think Clark looked like she enjoyed it a little bit, and it's definite that Elina was digging it. She even said in her interview afterwards that she saw "fireworks" and that Clark's lips were so soft. Ah, romance. Hannah wasn't into it though, saying to the camera that "I am from a small town and I normally wouldn't hang with characters like Elina or Isis (pause) because she's a transgender." If that wasn't enough to seal her fate as someone who holds extreme prejudice in her heart, just wait, there's more.

A few moments after that, Isis swam a bit too close to her and she physically pushed her. I couldn't believe it. Her excuse was that she didn't want anyone in her space. Were we just supposed to ignore the two other girls she was sandwiched between like an oreo cookie? She didn't mind her arms and legs rubbing against those girls, but Isis got within three feet of her and she got physical. Back in the bedrooms, Sheena and Britney tried to explain that her behavior was offensive, but instead of admitting it and wanting to learn from the experience, she gave her excuse ("I am a stereotypical white girl, so I don't go around saying things like "Hey" and screaming and doing stuff like that.") and then cried for sympathy.

Pretty much the rest of the shots from the house this week revolved around Hannah's obvious dislike for people who are different from herself. Honestly, I'm not sure if Hannah knows what a stereotypical white girl is, but she seems to have some pretty strong opinions in her mind about stereotypical black girls and transgenders and lesbians... and she just knows that she's not like that.

After we watched several clips of one group after another either bashing Hannah or bashing the people who were bashing Hannah, they finally decided to call a "house meeting" and get it out in the open. I have to speak in Hannah's defense here a bit though. She was totally ambushed. that had to be disturbing! Basically, they just gathered everyone together and asked her if she was racist, to which she replied, "No, but thanks for critiquing me." and then, she cried. I did fell a little bit sorry for her. And don't you hate that in the previews they didn't show her saying no? They just showed her walking off... which is a blatant attempt at exploiting the situation for the drama of it.

Later, of course, I felt less sorry for her when she was describing the house meeting as being "like gang rape or gang violence". Obviously this small town girl has no idea how far that was from something as terrible as gang rape. We'll just have to watch and see how the drama plays out from here and if she continues to show prejudice or not. I'll tell you one thing, though, the episode made me glad thatI don't live in a house with 12 other women.

The only other interesting house event worth mentioning is that we got to watch Isis take her hormone shots. It became a bonding event between her and Analeigh when she asked her to come in the bathroom and distract her from the pain while she was taking her injections. I have to say, Analeigh was a good friend to her. She made her laugh and passed zero judgment on her for it.

Modeling Drama: Can you pose?

Everyone's favorite poser was back this week to teach the noob models a thing about extreme posing. Benny Ninja met with the girls and had them pose inside red fabric tubes. Most people did a decent job, but the most common comment was that their poses were good, but their faces were not. I'm sure it's hard to concentrate on two things at once, so we have to give them a little bit of time to get used to it. Haha. Sheena was called out for being the best and the most flexible (she can do that standing up full split that the girl from Pussy Cat Dolls does in the "When I grow up" video). Probably the worst of the day was Hannah, who just couldn't figure it out. Benny said she was "lost in translation", which I thought was clever.

The next Tyra mail said something about whether you've got it in the bag and Lauren Brie made the oh so very astute observation that, "I think it might be a challenge about posing, but I'm not sure." Wow, could that be because you guys just spent eight hours learning how to pose? I wonder...

Surprise, surprise, when they walked into their challenge the next day, Benny was there, doing a full split across a couch with a tiny little gold hat sparkling on his head. Posing it is! Tarina Tarantina, a famous handbag and jewelry designer, was there to judge the girls as they did their best to model her accessories and make her collection pop. The winner was to be the model with the most inventive poses.

Just a few notes on some of the things they came up with: Sam looked like she had no clue at all how to pose, most of the girls just copied each other, Hanna put the bag on the chandelier, which was totally weird, and Nikeysha was dumb enough to walk onstage and say "If I pee on myself, it's for you, cause I really need to go to the bathroom." Oh. My. God. I couldn't believe she actually said that! And that still wasn't the worst thing. Sheena, who was the best poser from the day before, actually did a weird kind of split and placed the bag right in front of her hoo-hoo. The designer found the pose very disrespectful. The winner of the challenge was Elina, who got to take home a bag full of sparkly jewelry. I wonder if she got a tiny sparkly hat?

The Tyra Mail announcing the photo shoot said something about "climbing the ladder" so I had a feeling it would be another top model flying through the air kind of shot. I wasn't exactly expecting a giant hot air balloon though. It was a cool idea, but unfortunately the wind was blowing it around crazy and they had to just hang the ladder from a crane and then superimpose the picture of the girls and ladder with the balloon later.

Lauren Brie was first up, and no one really touched her in creativity. Here are my notes for the other girls, in shorthand:
Elina: Looked like Angelina Jolie.
Analeigh: Ouch. No.
Sheena: Hooch.
Isis: Struggling a bit - bad facial expression.
Nikeysha: So lost. She has no control.
Britney: No good poses.
Joslyn: Great posing and face!
Clark: Terrible. She was sitting on the ladder.
Hannah: Stick figure.
Samantha: Not aware of her dress at all.
McKey: Great when he wasn't taking the pictures. Not so great when he was.
Marjorie: Very good! She looks great with long hair!!!

Later that night, the dreaded Tyra mail announcing panel and that they would be down to only 12 put a sour puss on everyone's faces. Especially after Sheena said, "Ya'll better start packing, hehe." You could hear crickets, I'm telling you. Everyone looked like they feared for their very lives.

Panel Drama: Up, Up, Up and Away

Miss J. Alexander's giant gold necklace said it all. "13" and next week it will only be "12". Do you think he had those especially made? Oh, and I wanted to comment on Paulina's hair. It was super short, but very cute. Did she cut it or just have it pulled up? I couldn't tell.

Tyra got right down to business, and the story was the same for the majority of the pictures: Nice angles, Nice Poses... Bad face. Lauren Brie's photo was the only one that just really made them say "Wow!" and I have to agree. It was worlds better than last week, and really looked like something you would see in Vogue. Elina, Marjorie, and Joslyn also got very good reviews on their pictures.

The most notable embarrassing comments during panel were Nigel saying that Clark's face looked like it was a weird color at panel ("I may have gone a little crazy with the powder and stuff"), Tyra saying that Isis looked like she was in Elementary school (what the hell was she wearing? This is the second week in a row she has looked very bad in panel... she better get it together!), and them calling Britney merely a "High End Catalog" girl. (Of course, Tyra made the comment that she could make a million dollars a year being a catalog girl... and she acted like that was no big deal. I'll take that job, thank you very much.)

The worst of panel, however, was what happened with Sheena. Paulina asked her flat out if her breasts were fake, saying that they were not just big, they were so "placed." Sheena said no at first and went back to her spot. After they were done with the photos, however, and before they made their final decision, Sheena asked to come forward and she admitted that she needed to fess up and tell the truth. Yes, she had a boob job when she was younger. So, she lied, but in the end she came up and told the truth, which is probably one of the only things that saved her this week. Tyra claimed that she already knew her breasts were fake, and I am sure Paulina knew she was lying too. I mean, these women have made a career out of their beauty and their bodies... they know fake when they see fake. I'm glad she told the truth though. That took guts.

So, who's picture gets the digital display for the week? Lauren Brie. The judges even said her picture was top five in the history of top model, which is a huge compliment. It really was a great photo, I must say. Elina was called second and everyone said she looked like "Angelina Jolie" modeling. It's true, but I think she's more ethereal than Angelina. We'll see what they do to Elina in makeovers. I'm scared.

When it came down to final two, it was Isis and Nikeysha. They told Isis that she's a beautiful girl (at which point the camera cut to Hanna making a weird face that read "girl? yeah, right.") , but that she needed to look better in person. They told Nikeysha that she is way too thin and she does not ever stop talking. I personally think she did better this week, but still... she is awfully skinny. In the end, two weak photo shoots in a row sent Nikeysha packing. She cried as she packed her bags and talked about her experiences and her goals and her disappointment... and she talked some more... and she continued to talk as the credits rolled and eventually faded to black, cutting off her final top model ramble.

Next Week's Drama: Makeovers!!!!

I can't wait!! And in the preview, they have Elina sitting in a chair at the salon and Miss J is saying "This will be the very first time in top model history." Any guesses what they are going to do to her? I haven't got a clue, but I am going to be counting down the days until we find out!

Hannah

Perky 19 year old Hannah is from Fairbanks, Alaska, and you can tell from her video on cwtv.com that she doesn't get out much. She is super cute, even if she does come off a tad bit naive (or ditzy perhaps.)

She claims that she is used to wearing tons of layers when it comes to clothing, but you can tell from her Hippie pic that she seems to be totally comfortable out of her clothes as well. I think this whole experience will be totally new for her, and it will be fun to watch her. The only annoying thing will be if she won't shut up about how she grew up in Alaska and had no running water and shit... I mean, there's only so many times you can hear that before you want to punch a baby.

When she went to audition, she said she almost didn't go because she was doing laundry (uh huh, sounds like she's completely invested in wanting to be a model), but she decided to go to the casting call anyway. She was taken aback when she got there and most people had gone all out in their new weaves and their cocktail dresses, but she just wore her old cowboy boots. I think that's a cute story, as long as she proves that she really wants to be a model. It will just turn out to be a sad story if she didn't want to model and all of these other girls had wanted it so so much. Like Kimberly from last season... I really was pissed at her for quitting.

I like Hannah's look in general, though. She seems unique and can have many different looks, already from just the two pics and the video. Let's hope she's ready to bring it.